Walking Dead S2 Ep10 - 18 Miles Out

This is one of the few shows that I watch on television. So in case you missed it, here's the link to the Walking Dead episode 10 of season 2. By far the best one this season
Click on the link below

S2 Episode 10 - 18 Miles Out

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The "Twitter Circle" Mythology

Every now and then, someone brings up the topic of the mythological "twitter circle" and mentions my name. Honesty hour, I didn't have shit to do with it! You're telling me I'm the reason your friends with other people on twitter? Get the holy fuck out of here. Let me explain what happened and I'll let you decide...

RT @juju_89: rt if you think im ugly

Awhile ago, as friendships were already established and new troops were being recruited, I tweeted "yall just let anybody in the circle" which I guess people took it out of context. Now everybody's pondering. "who's in the circle?" "I am I in the twitter circle?" "Yall lame for having a circle" "I'm in an octagon" "I want to be in the circle" smh everybody on twitter has their people they talk to which includes real friends, new friends, and family. I had mines too and I just addressed something about MY followers. Whether you took it to the extreme that day is totally up to you. I did play along for a minute (which was a mistake) because my followers were acting like bitches because they weren't apart of something. That I am guilty of but as far as creating friendships and labeling it a "twitter circle", i am not. People were already friends before I even said something. Shit, I don't even follow 90% of yall. Most of the "twitter all stars" tweet the same shit and have the same opinions. 

ACCEPTING THE FACT THAT YOU'RE IN THE TWITTER CIRCLE AND SHUTTING THE FUCK UP COMPLAINING ABOUT IT

It's been over a year and it's new people and there's old people. That circle is pretty much inevitable and concrete as long as that circle of trust exist. As long as you have mutual friends and want apart of that gossip, you're pretty much in that circle. The funny thing is, nobody wants to be apart of something they're already apart of, which is amazing to me. They just hate the label because it makes them look "lame". Well newsflash, you're already lame. If you tweet all day for notoriety, it shows your true colors and what do you think society's perception of you is?  I'm not the one to judge and label, but the difference between me and you, I can accept who I am. 

SIGNS THAT YOU"RE IN THE TWITTER CIRCLE

#1 - 10   You hosted, you were nominated, or won a twitter award!!!!

In closing statements, I am not in the twitter circle. Did I create it? No. Did I have a part in labeling it? Yes. Do I care whether this twitter circle exist or not? Absolutely not. The people who scrutinize it, really want to be apart of it. Do what you do and embrace the fact that you're apart of the AV club and stop mentioning my name.

Thanks, Management

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The Eating Ass Debate

Kevin Hart just ate some ass face

Are you tired of this ongoing twitter debate about eating ass? If the answer is yes then let me have a moment of clarity, I EAT ASS.

The funny thing about that is I was like you before. Hating, slandering, talking shit about something I never tried. "Don't knock it until you try it" that really goes without saying nowadays. You thought the same thing before you ate pussy; it was the nastiest shit in world right? Wrong, because you finally tried that shit and it was like watching Lion King for the first time. Somewhere in between that time frame, you cried because it was so epic.

DON'T LET TWITTER FOOL YOU 

Remember, twitter is full of socially challenged teenagers, virgins, and sexually frustrated adults. Don't let these losers affect your ass eating decisions. If the opportunity presents itself, take a chance and if you don't like it, tweet about it. We'll be there for you. 

ASS EATING LAWS

Exhibit A (dreads are not a requirement)

There are laws to this shit. It's mainly common sense but just in case you need a play by play, write this down.

1) Unless you have dreads or is equivalent to this low life lifestyle, don't go out eating club ass. Countless times I went on WSHH (I only go on there to see the bitches) and seen some darkskin dude (usually he from ATL) eating stripper ass. Don't do it in the club, don't take her home and do it, we're talking about wifey. That is thee only exception!

2) Make sure she's clean, once again common sense. Just because she smells nice on the outside doesn't mean she washed her ass. Bitches spray perfume over feminine odor smh. I'm just keeping it real. I mean like you actually have to watch her wash her ass. 

3) Wash your face and brush your teeth afterwards. You're not going to go to work with your face smelling like shit unless you're just normally an unsanitary human being and you're trying to get fired. Unless you don't have a job or nowhere to go, do what you want fam, she about to leave you anyway.

Yeah, I'm not even going to go here

That's it for now, I'm not going to instruct you how to eat ass. This isn't sex ed ad truthfully there's only one way to do it.

PEEEEAAACE!

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Celebrating Black History Month: 25 Black Films That Made History

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Oscar Nominations & Predictions 2012

I don't know why I love award shows so much. Something about awarding the most elite human beings and makes us feel like the shitty ones is really entertaining. The Oscars are my favorites and I love Eddie Murphy. Billy Crystal? uh...not so much. So I was kind of upset that he declined the offer to host.

Why wasn't John Stewart or hell even Ellen Degeneres a shoe in? He made a couple of pre oscar viral videos that were Dane Cook funny. When Harry Met Sally was like 2 decades ago and he was old then.

Let Daniel Tosh host the Oscars next year and make these rich white bastards uncomfortable. Make a web rendition of the movies that weren't nominated.

Now, for the nominees...

I already know people don't care about the Oscars period so I'm going to just pick the most important ones. The highlighted ones are the ones I WANT to win. It's a bias prediction. It's pretty much just voting for Barack Obama because he's black. And nobody cares because it's just the Oscars and I haven't seen all the movies and I'm sure you didn't either.

I know it looks kinda crappy but I thought it would take less time to just copy/paste and highlight my predictions from the website. I'm not going to overcompensate for 20 or less views...enjoy! Watch the Oscars February 26, 2012


Actor In a Leading Role

• • Demián Bichir
    A Better Life
  • George ClooneyThe Descendants
  • Jean Dujardin
    The Artist
  • Gary Oldman
    Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy
  • Brad Pitt
    Moneyball

Actor In a Supporting Role

• • Kenneth Branagh
    My Week With Marilyn
  • Jonah Hill
    Moneyball
  • Nick Nolte
    Warrior
  • Christopher Plummer
    Beginners
  • Max von Sydow
    Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close

Actress In a Leading Role

• Glenn CloseAlbert Nobbs
• Viola Davis
  The Help
• Rooney Mara
  The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
• Meryl Streep
  The Iron Lady
• Michelle Williams
  My Week With Marilyn
  
  
  Actress In a Supporting Role
  • • Bérénice Bejo
      The Artist
    • Jessica Chastain
      The Help
    • Melissa McCarthy
      Bridesmaids
    • Janet McTeerAlbert Nobbs
    • Octavia Spencer
      The Help
  • 
    
    Directing
    • • The Artist
        Michel Hazanavicius
      • The Descendants
        Alexander Payne
      • Hugo
        Martin Scorsese
      • Midnight in Paris
        Woody Allen
      • The Tree of Life
        Terrence Malick
    • 
      
      Writing (Original Screenplay) 
      • • The Artist
          Written by Michel Hazanavicius
        • Bridesmaids
          Written by Annie Mumolo & Kristen Wiig
        • Margin Call
          Written by J.C. Chandor
        • Midnight in Paris
          Written by Woody Allen
        • A Separation
          Written by Asghar Farhadi
      • 
        
        Best Picture

        
        

        • The Artist
          Thomas Langmann, Producer
        • The Descendants
          Jim Burke, Alexander Payne and Jim Taylor, Producers
        • Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close
          Scott Rudin, Producer
        • The Help
          Brunson Green, Chris Columbus and Michael Barnathan, Producers
          
          
          • Hugo
            Graham King and Martin Scorsese, Producers
          • Midnight in Paris
            Letty Aronson and Stephen Tenenbaum, Producers
          • Moneyball
            Michael De Luca, Rachael Horovitz and Brad Pitt, Producers
          • The Tree of Life
            Sarah Green, Bill Pohlad, Dede Gardner and Grant Hill, Producers
          • War Horse
            Steven Spielberg and Kathleen Kennedy, Producers

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Movies To Look Out For In 2013

I get all of my sources from the movie database so take it up with them if they sound a little fictional. Some movies I will mention are undated but lets hope they get released in 2013.


Robocop 

A week ago, I seen this up on IMDB with a release date of 2013 and if you go on there now it's full of question marks and uncertainty. If you look at the picture it says "coming in 2010" so cosmic con geeks are probably getting their panties in a bunch. I'm guilty of weeping about Sin City 2 which was supposed to be released this year according to IMDB three years ago. I digress, it would be cool to see another Robocop in this day and age with all of the cool updated cgi but it wouldn't be nearly as cool as the other superhero movies because lets be honest, a robot cop is pretty much obsolete.



Arrested Development The Movie  

Hey "they canceled the show too early fans" guess what's currently in development? No, not Firefly it's Arrested Development, the movie. Jeffrey Tambor confirmed this on Craig Ferguson that they are in the works and it is definitely coming out in 2013.  

24 The Movie

Speaking of Fox shows that got canceled, Jack Bauer is back! And the lovely Mary Lynn Rajskub who plays Jack's CTU assistant Chloe O'Brien will still be helping him through his covert operations. If you don't know anything about 24, the show is filmed in real time and Jack kicks some terrorists ass every 30 minutes through his day. My only question is how are they going to make a movie about 2 hours? But anything is possible when we're talking about a dude who doesn't piss, shit, sleep, or eat for a whole day and still manages to kill Muslims. Look out for this in 2013. I know I will.

The Apocalypse 

Freaks and Geeks, Undeclared, and all the Judd Apatow movies reunite in 2013 for "The Apocalypse". This movie includes some of your favorite white comedic actors like Seth Rogan, Jonah Hill, James Franco, Jay Baruchel, Danny McBride, and the black Craig Robinson. I'm predicting the funniest comedy since 40 Year Old Virgin but probably a little more ridiculous. 

That's all for now. Let me do some more research and i'll get back to you....when I feel like it. 

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Movies That Sucked! Black Edition

Anybody who knows me think I'm racist against my own race. That's not completely true. I just think we make crappy movies 85% of the time. This blog right here will demonstrate the past fuck ups that I had the pleasure of seeing. Lets all read this together then ask ourselves this rhetorical question, why do white people hate us?

10. B.A.P.S. (1997) 

Omg Halle Berry what the fuck was were you thinking? This is the type of behavior we expect from the fat chick on the left who I do not care to IMDB. This is the type of shit you fire your agent for. B.A.P.S. stands for Black American Princesses not Black American Pictures Suck like I thought it did. Do you care whether I summarize this piece of shit or shall we move on?

9. Phat Girlz (2006)

Here's another movie title with bad acronyms. Phat Girlz: Pretty Hot And Thick? If you're like me, you probably didn't see this film but still know what happened. Let me guess, fat girl is insecure about her weight, some african heartthrob strangely finds it attractive. Joke joke, pun pun, they get married and have kids with thyroid and diabetes. That's exactly what happened right? No I'm not a psychic, it's just your typical black romantic comedy with Monique and the Beauty Shop gang. Sequels include, Hairshow, Nora's Hair Salon 1&2, Beauty Shop, and The Parkers.    

8. Glitter (2001)

This is the viewers choice for my 10 ten list. I personally have never seen it but I heard she got dropped from her label because the movie was so horrible. Damn Mariah. I never liked Mariah Carey and still don't but she has a couple of songs I like. As far as acting go, stick to your day job but I guess selling over 200 millions albums worldwide and having 18 hit singles under your belt isn't enough. You just have to show the world you can do more than break wine glasses with that opera singer voice of yours. I don't even consider Mariah Carey black but a lot of people in this movie was black. Yeah, even Terrance Howard.

7. State Property (2002)

Back in the day, Rocafella made clothes, music, liquor, diapers, phone cases, beepers, oh and even movies. State Property was one of them and I'm man enough to admit, I was attracted to this kind of lifestyle. Watching this in the present really make me think I was a dumb kid. This movie was horrible! Nonstop violence throughout the whole movie. The "Get down or lay down" code is in full effect and now slavery is reincarnated. Beanie Sigel, the leader of the pack, killed everybody in this movie but himself. It was like watching the ending of Scarface for 2 hours. But if it's any consultation, this was back in the day when rappers couldn't sell records without putting a gun in their song. I know that didn't help but I tried.

6. The Block Is Hot (2000) 

I could of made this whole blog just about hood movies but I just picked the closest to mainstream ones I could think of. Everybody knows Lil Wayne but before Lil Wayne was the best rapper, he was part a rap group that was anti-good acting. The Block Is Hot was as illiterate and moronic as their album cover illustrations. Their raps were turned into movie form with their vulgar misogynistic views towards women and shooting a mailman? Wait, it gets worse. That's was all I was thinking as I shot myself halfway into the movie. Magnolia seems like the place I wouldn't want to raise my kids. Thank you Cash Money for enlightening me that not only africans are living in severe poverty. Bling bling

5. Madea's Diary of a Mad Black Woman/Family Reunion (2005-2006)

Who could forget Shemar Moore wearing a cornrow wig in that one Madea movie that was almost same as the other one, that was exactly like that other one, that is very equivalent to that other Medea movie he made. Anybody that finds Tyler Perry dressing up like a stereotypical black single grandmother funny is a fucking lunatic. Don't we all just wish Tyler Perry was still sleeping in his minivan? He can perpetuate stereotypes as long as black people are paying money to see it. Here's a movie title, Madea Goes To Hell. I hate everything about his movies from start to finish. Nuff said


4. Love Don't Cost A Thing (2003)

Ok Nick Cannon fans cover your baby ears because the scrutiny is about to be real. Let me start by saying I hate Christina Millan's cute incredibly bland ass and I'm sure Nick Cannon feels the same way. Now, this movie was beyond unreal. Geeks pays popular girl thousands of dollars to date him to make him popular in school. I hate this movie because it worked. That shit will never work in real life. This script must have been wrote by white people because no black people ever says the kind of lame shit that comes out of Nick Cannon's mouth. And this was the last time anybody has ever heard of Christina. Thank you Jesus.

3. Soul Plane (2004) 

Hey I have an idea, let's make a plane with bitches and a club for niggers and make a movie out of it.

What an incredible idea! - KKK

This movie is the epitome of stereotypes and far from funny. The rapper Snoop Dogg is really the only thing to look forward to and it seems like he's the only comedian in this movie.

This movie never happened as far as I'm concerned.

2. Norbit (2007)

Eddie Murphy's sexuality was already in question and I think this was his coming out party. Norbit is Eddie Murphy's worst movie and as a fan, I'm extremely disappointed. It's about some queer black guy who ends up dating his grade school bully.He plays both characters Norbit and Rasputia and this story couldn't be even more dumber. Only fat black people find this shit funny. There was not one time I laughed. Most of the funny parts were about Rasputia using her slovenly overweight body for gags and I don't even think a child would find this hilarious. Lets face facts, we will never get the Raw Eddie Murphy back.

1. Killa Season (2006)

I hope I don't get shot by somebody from Harlem for writing this but this is the worst movie I ever seen in my life. This is another story about a rapper/drug dealer on the come up and it seems like killing people over small things and spitting on kid's faces is the on way to gain respect. Every now and then, Cam'ron Giles the star of this hood abomination, does a musical number and all of a sudden, the movie turns into a rap video. The scene where Cam'ron cries for help because his little niece gets her cap peeled back, is probably the funniest shit I ever seen in my life. I'm pretty much alienated from the kind of idiots who beg for a sequel. This movie is straight up trash and lags way too much. Yet, Cam is still the man but acting aint him. Nor is crying, writing a script, and being on Bill O'Reilly live.

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